Sleeping is the 5th driver. Met or not met?

Ugg, Sundays again? I thought they went out of style last summer.

97% Guitar and and 87% vocal on Dirty Little Secret at the same time. I'm dirty little AWESOME!

It might just be me, but the dude at Blackstar seems like an ass.

Figures I leave the house when people are outside.

"Topical Anesthetic for Dermal Analgesia" That'll do!

It's Friday then 1-day weekend and you know what that means? We need to drink twice as much tonight!

Ever had a bag of peas stuck to your head? I have. Thanks Mom!

Okay, oww. Anybody know what I can use to numb earlobes?

Turns out I may have Tramatophobia: fear of injury. Would explain a lot.

Money is stupid. When are the credit skin barcodes coming?

Wow, I'm getting better at playing guitar and doing vocals on RB...wonder if my neighbors agree.

Walking at night is fun. Could always use a second pair of feet though. Volunteers?

I complain about the sun all the time but have done nothing to stop it.

I complain about the sun all the time but have done nothing to stop it.

Wow, I can feel emotions coming back...I need booze tonight.

Let me make myself CLEAR: Customers are idiots.

WTB 1 life. Willing to pay with a round of booze.

I just had a nightmare where the government stole my liver. For somebody that doesn't dream, that's terrifying.

My watch doesn't tell time, I make a suggestion and it agrees.

My watch doesn't tell time, I make a suggestion and it agrees.

I have dead people in my hair.

My hair has a crazy case of bleach burn, anybody know hte best cure?

Ok, so picturing everybody is in their underwear...wait I'm clothed. Damn it, they're STILL looking at me!

I not only just exterminated my impostor's forum account, I closed their Gmail as well. I win.

This is not a comment about how awesome Fridays are. Take that majority!

I want to change my first name to Alpha. #1 in my head and on paper.

I'm afraid we might have schizophrenic paranoia but he doesn't.

Whoo hoo, Monday! Let the good times roll. Let the good times rolllloll.

Hey look at me, I can play guitar and sing at the same time!