*Blink Blink* Since when can Eric fly?

Woot, surprise weekend! Off until tuesday.

Baby when you finally, get to love somebody. Guess what? It's gonna be me.

Doughnuts can be used as a reward or failure. On one hand: yum. The other: Oh god, I give up good bye halth.

Wow. The news is messed up.

I'm not crazy, I'm just roll with the sanity crew. With my rep as it's going, soon I could actually be in sane.

So my sneakers take a minute longer than sandals to put on. Don't sneakers make you faster?

Umm oww. My 8g wont go back in, it was only like an hour they were out.

I swear Your Honor, We didn't start the fire. It was always burnin since the worlds been turnin.

Poll Time: Do you have a work place crush? *Watches co-workers get nervous*

Anybody else ever wonder if Reese's Pieces are made of some guy named Reese?

Tackly Alien is looking good, now has a phne body.

You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.

Human Resource Manager. So people are in the same category of oil. Unlike oil, they get mad if you filter them and pump them into your car though.

I feel so totally freaking awesome right now. I don't even know how to describe it. Is this success?

For some reason I have circus music going through my head.

Woot finally top dog.

What's the job title of people who are hired by comapnies to go in and fire people? I wanna do that.

Thank god it's over. That day was rough.

I'm not onlyt an employee, I'm a member! Lame number though 718-795-6073

Somebody rang my buzzer! I hope it's a package! ...That sounds so wrong.

BREAKING NEWS: Fat Balding Dirty Guy drinking DIET Coke...out of 2L bottle!

Turns out there are people better than me, they just don't flaunt it. That's almost worse than lying.

Finally got all of my misic syned with my phone afain. Wanna guess my ringtons?

Cloth armor, fits me like a glove. Just twitta a time and I'm ready for love.

Single white human, looking for group http://ping.fm/I6JB8

PoC'd 3/4 of the day. Awesome way to end a week.

This "man of god" is talking bad about coffee. We should nail him to a cross.

Just spent the last 2 weeks watching the entire season of Arrested Development. Next?

If I was in love with a cardiologist who broke my heart can I sue for malpractice?

Yeah, I'm totally not working to my fullest potential today.

Epic robbery at Frontenac Mall. I wanna go see it myself! http://bit.ly/Pbdmi

Personal best: 57 chats today with exactly 10 minute average handle time. According to sup, may not be lower daily handle to date.

Monkey brains! nomads nomads nom!

Ugg only got 41! I'm such a failure! Only a little glossy eyed.

What do you get when you combine hippies and a bus? Baked seagull foof. Reduce, Runover, Recycle!

Turns out I'm not a villain but more like anti-hero. I can live with that.

You are what you eat: Fast food, cheeseburgers. I must be Fast and cheesy with a side of fries.

A new work week, need a new reason to actually go... Other than rent, I got nothin. You?

Yeah, so I think my facial hair attributed to at least 30% of my cool.

That walk got me so wet I had to peel my clothes off. MONSOONED!

I'm so pure I skipped 6G. Have 4Gs in my main holes now. They are complete. One more step on the 2nd and we're done :D

Am I the only one who thinks the True Blood opening rocks?

Looking for awesome people to play eRepublik with http://snurl.com/pjwhb

No plans for my weekend. Mon/Tues kinda sucks.

Wow there is a Wii game called "Real Herpes: Firefighter". Oh wait, thats heroes.

Looking for ideas of things to do with paper clips at work.

"I'm on my way .....down!...main offender" No idea what this guy is sayin.

Do people actually ask others out on dates anymore? I think I need to be retaught the whole dating thing. Any teachers?

I feel...kinda empty. What's going on?

"You look like a girl who has heard way too many pickup lines. Can I have your number in case I need one?"

Pantloops: Not just for belts!

It figures. I get a shower to get ready for my walk and it starts raining.

Go go weekend entertainment!
*waits for entertainment to comment*

One score down last month. In concern. Didn't care enough to read the chat.

I have a something in my head. Thanks Nicole.

The LPGA makes too many potentially dirty comments.